The Standard of Excellence

“The meaning of things lies not in the things themselves, but in our attitude towards them.” Antoine de Saint

  have been writing about conditioning and comfort zones, however, I want to really get you to understand how the cause and effect of what has been happening to you and how it really affects your life.

It is called The Standard of Excellence

It’s not too often we look at the Standard of Excellence in light of our own way of doing things. It is usually compared to the Standard of Excellence to how a company performs, or a product performs, or an education system working toward a high standard of excellence, or the standard of excellence for sportsmanship. 

However, it is perfectly “normal” to use The Standard of Excellence to our perceptions.

During our conditioning we have formed what is right and wrong. Our perceptions of what we have seen so far in our life are based on our experiences. What we have read, what we have seen, and who our mentors have been, are a few places that we have learned our perceptions.

What is The Standard of Excellence for you? The Standard of Excellence is what you decide is acceptable.

Here is an example: 

You might know someone that is an absolute work hound. He/she works to make more money, and when not working at that purpose is working on living on a clean esthetic environment, which might mean absolute organization, a scrubbed porch to a beautifully landscaped yard.

If that person was put into an environment that was less than his/her Standard of Excellence, then that person will clean up his/her environment to the best of his ability. If he doesn’t, he has done a very destructive thing to his mind and he/she has been short-changed. 

He has learned to accept a standard of excellence that is not up to his own standard of excellence. 

Let’s go into a relationship. You have probably seen the show, “The Odd Couple.” If not, here is a quick run down of that old sitcom. Two divorced men live together in an apartment. They both have jobs. One is Mr. Very Neat and the other is Mr. Slob. They each drive each other totally nuts. 

The slob is happy being a slob and Mr. Neat is not happy living with Mr. Slob. Mr. Neat, cleans, organizes, dumps ashtrays the minute a cigarette is crushed out, and dusts anything that looks like it needs dusting. 

Mr. Slob, would rather live in his mess, and not be disturbed by Mr. Neat. 

This causes a lot of funny situations as the two try to live together. 

Unfortunately, this happens in real life, too, however there really is not much funny about the situation. A man marries a woman. The woman wants everything just so, which means the man needs to comply to make her happy. Maybe he has to pick up his socks, before she turns the negative emotions on. 

“Why do you always leave your disgusting socks on the floor for me to pick up?” she screams.  This is not aimed at men. There are many men who live with women who are slobs in their eyes, too. 

His response will be whatever he is conditioned to respond. “Because I feel like it!” or “ I was going to pick them up!” or “Why do you always sound just like my mother, if I wanted to live with my mother, I would never have married you!” Or, maybe he doesn’t answer her at all. In fact, next time it is his socks, the towel and his jeans that conspicuously land on the floor.

Whatever the reason for any of the above, is all conditioned responses. The person cleaning up after the other, is in the “I’m being used” mode, and the one who does not have the courtesy to take thirty seconds of his time, stays angry and pushed to do something he doesn’t want to do. 

The hurt one, feels unloved, for if the untidy one loved her/him, then he would pick up the socks every time, out of courtesy, out of respect or love, or to just plain avoid an argument. 

In order for one to live without lowering his/her standard of excellence he/she must pick up those socks, because they refuse to live like that. It’s below his/her own standards.  The one who will not pick up the socks has a lower standard of excellence in this particular area of his/her life.